Remember You Will Die

“Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life.” Of all the wisdom Steve Jobs could share, this was the lesson he began to close his 15-minute Stanford commencement speech with in 2005.

It’s not often in modern times that we talk about death. It’s almost frowned upon.

It’s been common throughout history for a culture to remind themselves of death.

Memento Mori the Romans would say – remember that you are mortal. During the victory parade following a successful battle, Roman generals would actually have a slave riding in their chariot, repeatedly whispering, ‘remember you are mortal.’

Buddhism has a meditation practice called, Maraṇasati, which translates to mindfulness of death. The goal of the practice is to create a sense of spiritual urgency. Buddhist monasteries are known to have skeletons hanging in their meditation halls.

In Meditations, Marcus Aurelius wrote to himself, “You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.”

Throughout history this acknowledgment of death has been used as a tool to be aware of how one spends their time. To constantly reevaluate one’s priorities.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life,” Jobs continued in his commencement address.

The reminder that your time is limited should create a sense of urgency. A push to start taking action towards doing what you actually want to do. To do more things that make you feel alive. Less of what drains your energy.

Alexander Den Heijer wrote that, “You often feel tired, not because you've done too much, but because you've done too little of what sparks a light in you.”

How much of our days are dead time? Scrolling social media, repeatedly checking email, watching endless amounts of Netflix.

In 12 Rules for Life, Jordan Peterson poses a question, “If somebody looked at how you currently spend your time and energy and defined you based on that, would you be happy with his definition of you?”

If this was how we defined our society, there would be a never ending surplus of Facebookers, Instagram scrollers, and Office watchers.

“Some people die at 25 and aren’t buried until 75,” Benjamin Franklin once quipped. We all know people who are alive, but dead. They’re breathing, but they’re barely going through the motions. A few things don’t break their way, so they quit. They dig in for a life of doing the bare minimum and killing time.

As Jobs finished his rift on death, he concluded, “No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet, death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it, and that is how it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It's life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new.”

Death is uncomfortable, but it’s coming. Let that reminder empower you. Remember your time is limited. Before every conversation or gathering of people important to you, remind yourself that this might be the last time. Eventually it will be. Even as I type those words, I know it sounds kind of morbid, but it’s a useful tool to make myself a little more patient and a little more present.